we are eternal...all this pain is an illusion...

Venomous voice, tempts me, drains me, bleeds me, leaves me cracked and empty. Drags me down like some sweet gravity…

18.04.2007.

Wreck of the day.

Well, sada bih trebala napisati nesto uzasno tuzaljka-lajk, tako da "goth djecurlija", koja dolazi na ovaj blog s predrasudom zbog mog url-a /koji, iskreno govoreci, i jeste magnet za upravo takve sljokica-ljude, kao sto volim da kazem- pravi šit. al ko kriv, nit do estetike nit do znacenja, onog aprila 2006. god kad sam ga napisala prvi i posljednji put u onu rubriku u postavkama/, mogu ostaviti izuzetno kreativan i produhovljen komentar nakon sto prelete preko posta i uoce taj bogohulni nedostatak sljokica, krvavih slova i zileta u zaglavlju i boxu. /ovom prilikom molim da me postedite, prosli put su tu bila tri breath-taking komentara u rekordnom vremenu, sto me naravno, odusevilo, i smjesta mi usadilo ideju u glavu da komentare uopce ne bi trebalo dozvoliti./ Ali ne, danasnji dan je dan poput svih ostalih, samo sto je uzasno lijepo vrijeme.

 

Tako je otpocela Stark epoha.

 

Moze li se biti pogresan natcovjek?

Mozda i moze.

/a-a, bez intertexta!/

 

Juce sam davala instrukcije iz matematike, bolje receno, male hintove, i sjetim se da je davno bilo kada sam ja to isto slusala u uskoj ucionici, prepunoj polena. Ovaj predmet je zaista cudnovat, i izuzetno drag ako pomocu njega uspijes barem trun pomoci zivotinjama ugrozenim od njega :D

Divan je osjecaj, ali zaista i zbunjujuci kada jednom suvise nadarenom djetetu objasnjavas za tebe vec zastarjelo gradivo iz spomenutog predmeta.

Da, uvijek zaboravim ovu...malu, razliku. /eto, obradovala si me cak i s ovim :D/

A sad mi na um pada Chopinhauerovkina: "Ja jednostavno suvise volim matematiku da bih je znala.", nakon interesantnog razmjenjivanja pojedinih ideja i stavova u gradskom nam prevozu, koji je usput sluzio i za ispovijedanje sa moje strane. Ali to i dlje ne mijenja moje emocije prema JGS-u.

I ako upotrijebimo svo znanje iz percepcije, i posmatramo haoticni dan kroz oko kamere /Murtina, realizam/, shvatim da sam nepomaknuta s onog istog polozaja u koji me ubacilo moje ponasanje u pocetku sedmice.

 

Nadam se da se nece nastaviti ova "tradicija" da svaki drugi dan ljudi odlaze ljutito, ili pak smireno, ali razocarano /ovaj drugi slucaj je na moju zalost/ sa vidnog mi polja.

/Glava mi je puna vec i od onog prvog dana./

 

Ali to nije ono sto me zabrinjava. Ono sto je bilo je mnogo gore od onog sto bi moglo biti. Valjda i ne moze gore /sto se tice ove teme/.

 

I naucila sam se necemu.

Da, znanje uistinu zna da boli.

 

I kad sad ovako u globalu pogledam ovaj post, shvatim da ovako nesto odavno nisam napisala. /pa ja, nisi se svadjala amebo/

Oh, kako god..

 

Driving away from the wreck of the day...

15.04.2007.

Eto ti odgovora, mama.

Hocu nazad,

na Vltavu.

10.04.2007.

Uma

Usla je u kabinet i zatekla me kako sjedim na svom mjestu.

"Je li se to molis?"

Otvaram oci, ugledam njeno zainteresirano, pomalo i zabrinuto lice, i odvratim joj smijeskom.

Shvatila je.

Da bi imalo poboljsala situaciju, uzela je sa majcinskom brizljivoscu /kakvu samo jos Schatz posjeduje/ i raspremila mi sto, pomakla torbu i krenula je zakacit za moju stolicu, ali se u tom trenutku predomislila i stavila tu istu torbu na svoju, vec torbom zauzetu, stolicu. "Smeta ti ovo".

Izvadila mi je svoje olovke, sarene, mnogo sarene bojice, izderala list iz tvoje sveske i sve mi pripremila.

 

Danas mi je slomila moje celije u mozgu.


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we are eternal...all this pain is an illusion...
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...dark side of the moon...

...sebi, da se sjetim dejvida gejla...
Puno je nacina, jedan je najbolji



D rest iz di ostatak

Vivat Academia! - pjevam ti Gaudeamus!

DeviantArt - udjes, vidis, postanes

202 iz d nambr! - ako uopce radiJo, onda ovaj

*d spešlest from d spešl vonz*

Cak i podocnjaci imaju podocnjake! =) - stupidnost koja granici sa psihodeliom :L =)

I konacno...moj san iz djetinjstva.

КГБ

КГБ -za psihe koji su doista naucili, ili barem donekle naucili, Русский.

**********
..

Comfortably numb - Pink Floyd

Hello...
Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me
Is there anyone home?

Come on, now.
I hear youre feeling down
Well I can ease your pain,
Get you on your feet again.

Relax.
I need some information first
Just the basic facts:
Can you show me where it hurts?

There is no pain, you are receding
A distant ships smoke on the horizon
You are only coming through in waves
Your lips move but I cant hear what youre sayin
When I was a child I had a fever
My hands felt just like two balloons
Now I got that feeling once again
I cant explain, you would not understand
This is not how I am
I have become comfortably numb

Ok.
Just a little pinprick. [ping]
Therell be no more --aaaaaahhhhh!
But you may feel a little sick.

Can you stand up?
I do believe its working. good.
Thatll keep you going for the show.
Come on its time to go.

There is no pain, you are receding.
A distant ships smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I cant hear what youre sayin.
When I was a child I caught a fleeting glimpse,
Out of the corner of my eye.
I turned to look but it was gone.
I cannot put my finger on it now.
The child is grown, the dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb.

Shine On You Crazy Diamond (I-V)

Remember when you were young,
you shone like the sun.
Shine on you crazy diamond.
Now there's a look in your eyes,
like black holes in the sky.
Shine on you crazy diamond.
You were caught on the crossfire of childhood and stardom,
blown on the steel breeze.
Come on you target for faraway laughter,
come on you stranger, you legend, you martyr,
and shine!
You reached for the secret too soon,
you cried for the moon.
Shine on you crazy diamond.
Threatened by shadows at night,
and exposed in the light.
Shine on you crazy diamond.
Well you wore out your welcome with random precision,
rode on the steel breeze.
Come on you raver,
you seer of visions,
come on you painter, you piper, you prisoner, and shine!

Shine On You Crazy Diamond (VI-IX)

Nobody knows where you are,
how near or how far.
Shine on you crazy diamond.
Pile on many more layers and I'll be joining you there.
Shine on you crazy diamond.
And we'll bask in the shadow of yesterday's triumph,
sail on the steel breeze.
Come on you boy child,
you winner and loser,
come on you miner for truth and delusion,
and shine


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